Romantic Scenes That Don't Turn Into A Rom-Com
Ready for my writing "life lesson" of the week? Today I had an epiphany about the difference between a scene that creates sexual tension in a sweet and romantic way, versus one that's silly and rom-com-y. Or at least, one of the main differences (plot and relationship context is important, too).
Short Version:
Long Version:
I had to rewrite a scene where the characters have a physical connection. A Moment, if you will. I've had to rewrite this a zillion times because of unrelated Plot Reasons. Each change involved a new setting, which necessitated a whole new scenario for the Moment, so I've had to brainstorm about this a lot.
In the early drafts, the easiest ways to get these two characters to touch seemed to be the accidental ones. Character A is hanging some plant or artwork, and character B catches him when he drops something or starts to fall. A trips and B steadies him. A is carrying something heavy and B jumps in to help, and their arms brush. Moment ensues.
I was never very happy with this, so good thing I had to change it. A more recent version was much more convincing, where they were out in the cold, and A starts shivering, so B brings him back inside, offers a coat, and rubs his arms. Oh, look at how close they are. A leans into B, B slows down, they touch, they linger. Warm fuzzies.
This wonderful, lovely, perfect scene had to get moved around for aforementioned Plot Reasons, which did not make me happy. I don't wanna change it now! Argh. How to get a totally different, sweet, romantic, convincing Moment? That's what got me thinking, and then the epiphany.
Because I already told you, this isn't going to be a surprise. I started realizing that the accidental touches--trips, falls, last-moment support or throwing someone out of the way or landing on them or catching them--those don't have the same punch to them. They don't have the premeditation, the deliberate decision, the intent borne of attraction. If a character makes an intentional choice to close a distance and make physical contact, they're putting themselves out there, communicating to the other character in a non-verbal fashion. It's an acknowledgement of their own attraction (even if it's subtle or subconscious), and hoping for the other to reciprocate. The accidental stuff, on the other hand, well it's just a coinkydink that they collided with the character they're attracted to and not someone else.
Maybe it's a mini-version of the characters creating the plot, rather than the plot happening to the characters. The choice and agency involved is where the sexual tension comes from, if you ask me. The reason the silly accidental brushes don't carry as much oomph is because it could have happened to anyone, at any time.
(PS: I like rom-coms.)
Short Version:
- Rom-com-y = accidental touches (tripping and falling into someone's arms, colliding with their hand when both reaching for something)
- Deliberate = intentional touches (gently moving someone aside, rubbing them while they're shivering)
Long Version:
I had to rewrite a scene where the characters have a physical connection. A Moment, if you will. I've had to rewrite this a zillion times because of unrelated Plot Reasons. Each change involved a new setting, which necessitated a whole new scenario for the Moment, so I've had to brainstorm about this a lot.
In the early drafts, the easiest ways to get these two characters to touch seemed to be the accidental ones. Character A is hanging some plant or artwork, and character B catches him when he drops something or starts to fall. A trips and B steadies him. A is carrying something heavy and B jumps in to help, and their arms brush. Moment ensues.
I was never very happy with this, so good thing I had to change it. A more recent version was much more convincing, where they were out in the cold, and A starts shivering, so B brings him back inside, offers a coat, and rubs his arms. Oh, look at how close they are. A leans into B, B slows down, they touch, they linger. Warm fuzzies.
This wonderful, lovely, perfect scene had to get moved around for aforementioned Plot Reasons, which did not make me happy. I don't wanna change it now! Argh. How to get a totally different, sweet, romantic, convincing Moment? That's what got me thinking, and then the epiphany.
Because I already told you, this isn't going to be a surprise. I started realizing that the accidental touches--trips, falls, last-moment support or throwing someone out of the way or landing on them or catching them--those don't have the same punch to them. They don't have the premeditation, the deliberate decision, the intent borne of attraction. If a character makes an intentional choice to close a distance and make physical contact, they're putting themselves out there, communicating to the other character in a non-verbal fashion. It's an acknowledgement of their own attraction (even if it's subtle or subconscious), and hoping for the other to reciprocate. The accidental stuff, on the other hand, well it's just a coinkydink that they collided with the character they're attracted to and not someone else.
Maybe it's a mini-version of the characters creating the plot, rather than the plot happening to the characters. The choice and agency involved is where the sexual tension comes from, if you ask me. The reason the silly accidental brushes don't carry as much oomph is because it could have happened to anyone, at any time.
(PS: I like rom-coms.)
Good point! The accidentals have their place, especially in the early comic stages -- but a deliberate touch involves the characters much more.
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